Saturday, March 12, 2005

I got my touch back.

Oh, my goodness. Gnocci is one of the best things in the world.

Steve and Zac and Kahlil and Zac's brother Seth came over tonight and Steve and I made gnocci. SO FLIPPING GOOD. I am in food heaven. I made the gnocci; he made the sauce. He did a reduction with red wine, balsamic vinegar, and garlic. OH MY LORD. It was fantastic. I think it was one of the best meals I've had...ever.

So, last night sucked -- I got in a car accident on my way home from work. :( Someone rear-ended me as I was turning left onto our street. It really, really sucked. So the Blazer is now broken and I am driving a rental car. I don't know yet what the verdict is -- they won't be able to get a claims adjuster out until next week. Hopefully it won't take too long to fix.

I definitely had a headache, though -- last night and today. It's better now, but I suspect that is due in large part to the fact that I got a massage today. Mmmm. So nice. It felt so, so good. I am going to go back again.

It's totally snowy again. There is about another foot out there. I am just about ready to buy a one-way plane ticket somewhere warm. WHY OH WHY ISN'T SPRING HERE?!

Well, I think I will take a shower and get in my jammies and get ready for bed. All the guys are watching Reservoir Dogs, but I just don't feel like watching a mob sort of movie tonight. I may get in the bath and read Jane Austen. (I'm in the middle of Pride and Prejudice -- Mr. Darcy has just declared his love to Elizabeth and she has refused him. What a great story.)

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

I think I'm losing my touch.

Where cooking is concerned, that is. I just haven't loved anything I have made lately. And last night? Oh, jeez, I cringe when I think of this.

*whispering because I'm so ashamed* I forgot to put the spices in the lentil pot pie I made for Steve and Carmen when they came over last night.

Oh yes, just forgot. It made for a very bland dinner. They were very polite about it, but I know it wasn't very good. And that's such a great dish, too -- when it's made right, that is. I was so pissed at myself. I still am, really. I cannot BELIEVE I forgot that! (IIIIIdiots! says Napoleon Dynamite). And the enchiladas I made for Alyssa and me just weren't that great the other night. And the asparagus dish I made for Russ and Jen wasn't great either. They were all terribly mediocre -- edible, yes, but not great or even very good.

I don't know what my deal is. I have got to get it together and be better, I guess. I am just not feeling terribly motivated to cook these days...partly because we don't have a ton of money, so when I go to the store I buy what's cheap and not what I really want or am inspired by. I mean, if I could shop at, say Whole Foods or Wild Oats or Nature's or something, I am sure I'd feel much more motivated than I do, given the amazing yumminess that exists in natural/organic food stores, particularly in the produce section.

Alas. I guess I have to regain my touch somehow. I'm thinking I need to come back with a bang...maybe gnocci? I've done it once, so it shouldn't be too hard...and it's a pretty impressive dish. I just need to come up with a really great sauce for it, and have a party and people will once again realize that YES, I really am a good cook. I'm not lying. I promise!!!

MORE snow.

Dear Winter,
You have worn out your welcome and it's time for you to go. Last night's storm was the final straw -- the snow, sleet, and freezing rain mix combined with 40 mph gusts was altogether too much, especially on top of what snow we already have.
Please, Winter, go back to your lair and stay there. I want to ride my moped and wear skirts and not have to dig my car out every morning. I am tired of you!
The sooner you leave, the less annoyed we'll all be when you come back next year. So just GO already!
Thank you for your attention to this matter,

Sunday, March 06, 2005

student loan drama update...

I got an email this week that they finally approved my consolidation request for my loans. Yahoo! But -- and of course, there is a but -- they aren't going to give me the incentive they promised of deferring my monthly payments until July. UGH. It's this technicality that becuase I applied in December, they won't do it for me, even though THEY took so long that the incentive they were offering then is already expired. So essentially I'm being penalized for their slowness. Pisses me off. I plan to fight it.

Anyway, it's been pretty sunny this weekend, but still cold. They're saying it's supposed to snow AGAIN on Tuesday. Why can't it just be Spring? I want to ride my moped and wear skirts without freezing my tail nice that will be.

Had Alyssa and Zoe and their boyfriends over for dinner and Cranium last night. I made enchiladas. They were pretty good (I made 2 9x13 pans of cheese ones and they all got!) but the bean ones I made for me and Alyssa weren't great...oh well. I just didn't love them as much as I liked the ones I made a couple of weeks ago. Cranium was fun and wild. I was so tired by that point, though, that I am afraid I was a less-than-enthusiastic player.

Church tonight, then work tomorrow. I have to go down to corporate twice this week -- Monday and Wednesday. :( It's the drive I don't relish -- it's a very solid hour and a half to two hours...blech. At least I'll have Susan to keep my company. That will be fun. I'll have to remember to put the CD player and some CDs in the car tonight so I will have them for the drive tomorrow. I need to clean out my car, too..aaak. When I am I going to get this done? We have church right after work today...and then we'll be there till late...and we leave tomorrow morning for corporate, so I just don't know. I guess I will have to try to do as much as I can tonight.

My hair is getting really long. It's weird; I haven't had long hair in a long time. I have it in pigtails today, which is probably a bit inappropriate/casual for work but I don't care. I get so tired of it hanging in my face. I can't decide if I want to let it grow or if I want to chop it all off. I think I want a little of both...though obviously not at the same time. Then I would have a mullet.

Well, I should wrap up -- supposedly I have someone coming at 11:15 to see an apartment, and it's almost that now. Today is going quickly so far so that is good! That is the one nice thing about working on the weekends: short days!

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Uncle Rico...

We watched home movies tonight, and it made me totally melancholy and sad and so, so homesick for Seattle and for our life there. We watched the one where we filmed our Vine Street apartment about 2 weeks after our wedding, and I just miss that so much. I don't miss the exact apartment, per se, I just miss that stage, that time, that glow of just being married -- we were happy and I loved my job and we were both working so we had extra money, and I kept my house clean and I loved to cook and we went out and did things, like visited coffee shops and bars and restaurants and went for walks along the waterfront and went to the Ballard Sunday Market and browsed in record stores and went to stand-up comedy and rode the bus and walked and went to art shows and baseball games and it was just a good time, almost a perfect time, really.

And I miss it, so much that it almost hurts sometimes. I want to regain that feeling about my life, and while life doesn't suck or anything now, I just don't feel the same way about it as I did before. I find that I just want to stay home. I don't want to leave and do anything (there's not that much to do here, especially during the winter, anyway); I just want to curl up on the couch and eat ice cream and knit and watch movies. Maybe that's why I've gained weight since we moved here...I don't go on walks (where does one walk in Maine besides the Back Cove?), I have a car, I live in a suburb and don't even walk a few blocks to get my lunch every day...yeah, I'm sure it's all of that combined.

Then we watched our video of our road trip out here. What excitement and anticipation we felt. That trip was so fun, even if by the end I was about ready to jump out of the moving vehicle if that was what it took to not have to ride in it any more. But what a closeness we shared -- nothing bonds like 5 days in a moving truck. It felt like such an adventure, like such a great and momentous undertaking. It was fun.

I don't know. Like I said, life is pretty good here right now. I really have nothing to complain about. But just watching those videos I was overwhelmed with the feeling that if I could go back in time, I would go back and re-live May 2003-November 2003...but I can't, and all I can do is go forward, so that is what I must do. And yet, I so don't want to be one of those people who lives in the past, like in Napoleon Dynamite how Uncle Rico continues to relive his high school football days (like when he chucks the steak and it hits Napoleon...oh, I laughed so hard), but sometimes it's hard to move on when a certain time seemed so good.

I guess I should just revel in the fact that those times were great and we were lucky to have them, and that there will be more of them eventually. Yes, becuase I certainly don't want to become like Uncle Rico -- neither in reliving my past, nor selling bad tupperware, nor in living in a van, nor in the sheer sleeze factor, nor in hitting on high school-aged I must fight the melancholy to avoid ever being remotely like Uncle Rico.