Friday, December 29, 2006

That's a blogging moment --or-- I couldn't make this stuff up --or-- Our Christmas with the family

We spent last weekend with our families in Portland, supposedly celebrating the holiday -- I guess these days, that means frenetically driving from house to house (three houses on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day), church service to church service (three church services on Christmas Eve), so that each family would be happy and placated.

While it was extremely exhausting (we came home at 7 a.m. on Tuesday morning, and I worked a half-day. That night, I went to bed at 8 p.m. because I just couldn't stay awake any longer. You'd think I was jet-lagged.), the family drama was definitely kept to a minimum (hooray!!) so we are officially calling this holiday, our first holiday being married and visiting our families, a success.

There were some great, classic moments during the trip, though. Our two phrases for the weekend, which we would whisper in each others' ears whenever something happened that was so totally random or weird that we couldn't quite believe it, were, "I couldn't make this stuff up!" or "Well, that's a blogging moment."

Except, unfortunately, I know our families sometimes read our blogs, so as to avoid hurt feelings and the like, I'm just going to keep most of those moments to myself.

Not that they're bad, or that anything awful happened, our families just did things that are, well...I'm not really sure how to describe it. Funny? Hilarous. Random? Very. Quixotic? Extremely. Anyway, basically, it's just stuff that is so quintessentially our families, that we find hilarious and weird but that we probably shouldn't share here.

This is kind of part of what I alluded to after Thanksgiving: how I had all this stuff mulling around in my head about our families and such. We love them dearly, but since we've moved back from Maine, we've been struck by how very different we are than our families. That is part of why we found all this stuff that happened funny and random and strange.

Aaaanyway, enough philosophizing. Time for a hilarious blogging moment story, with pictures!

We had lugged almost all of our dirty laundry down to Portland with us, because we have to pay to do laundry and it gets expensive really quickly. Plus, I'm kind of a laundry snob, and I hate the machines in our building -- they are small, and don't wash well, and I can't adjust the settings or let things soak. So it's a pleasure to use the huge, multi-setting-ed washers at my mom's or Brett's parents' houses.

So anyway, we hauled like three huge suitcases full of dirty laundry down to Portland, which left next to no room in our bags for bringing back any Christmas presents.

We quickly realized on Christmas day that we were going to have a problem getting everything back to Seattle. Our families were extremely generous, and we got a bunch of great gifts.

One other relevant blogging moment I should mention before I go any further is about Brett's uncle. Somehow, through means by which he will not reveal, he gets a hold of a ton of Victoria's Secret merchandise -- clothes, pajamas, makeup, body lotion, although as far as we know he's never gotten the lingerie...or maybe he has and he's never offered.

Anyway, Brett's sisters and I spent about two hours on Christmas night with him throwing (literally, throwing -- he used to play baseball in his younger days) things at us out of seven huge cardboard boxes -- makeup (I got four nice sets of it), clothes (a jean jacket, four sweaters, two blouses), one lone pair of underwear, a robe, and a sweatsuit that says, "Very Sexy" across the butt and down one arm. (It's super cozy, although a little more, um, flaunting than I'm used to. I mean, I don't generally go around proclaiming that I am Very Sexy. But now I guess it's true, since the sparkly gold words on my butt will proclaim it for me, and if that doesn't say sexy, well, then I don't know what does.)

So not only were our gifts not going to fit in the bags we had brought, we were bound by only being able to bring one other bag on the bus on the way home. (Which, by the way, was also a blogging experience in and of itself. But I'm not going to go there today.)

Brett's dad said that he had a suitcase we could use. So he went to the basement or wherever and brought out a huge rolly suitcase.

"Oh, that will work perfectly," I thought.

That is, until I saw that the zipper was all effed up and that it only zipped from the top about halfway around.

I started packing everything into the suitcase, and realized that it would be just big enough to fit the rest of our clean clothes, as well as most of our Christmas presents and the numerous things from Victoria's Secret via Brett's uncle.

Brett's dad came out when I was about done and said he'd help us tape it up. He was out of duct tape, so he had found a roll of strapping tape to use instead.

The three of us -- Brett, his dad, and me -- started taping it, but Brett quickly snuck away to sit on the couch and laugh while snapping the photos below.

When I snapped at him because he was laughing and taking photos instead of helping, he just said, "Well, come on, Leen. I thought it would be a great blogging moment for you!"

And I had to admit, he was right.

Now, on to the good stuff, the pictures of the two of us trying to wrangle a 50-pound suitcase stuffed with all of our Christmas presents into submission with strapping tape.

(Please pardon my giant, peachy, [Very Sexy] self in these photos.) (Apparently, the Very Sexy suit just makes me loook Very Chubby.)

Brett always loves to be a smart-aleck, and when I ask him where something is, he'll respond, "If it was up your ass you'd know." Well, from the looks of this photo, it seems as though he would have been right had I asked him the location of the scissors.

Notice the dog, Dylan, in the lower right-hand corner? I'm sure he's thinking, "Dude, these humans are sooo weird. What are they doing with that tape?"

Here we are, almost done ghetto-ify-ing our suitcase. Good times.

(Epilogue: The tape held perfectly, all the way home.)

1 comment:

Kris said...

too funny!